I finally have something positive to write about - yay!
I have had an utterly amazing week. What seemed like it would be disastrous 10 days ago has turned into the most positive experience. Everyone made a fuss of me at work, my Group made a fuss of me in the evening, and my family and friends made a fuss of me at the weekend. My flatmate did a 5-day fuss marathon... I've spent the last five days being made to feel totally loved and cherished.
The fact that I can even think the word "cherished" means I have come a long way since last weekend.
I think part of the experience has been to embrace my element. I'm naturally a very down-to-earth sort of a person, so taking on Earth didn't seem like it would be such a challenge. But with Saturn moving into Virgo, and turning 30 and being single, suddenly it seemed like the weight of the world was on my shoulders and I was being buried by it. You can have too much of a good thing.
So now I have had a couple of weeks to ponder, I have reached the conclusion that there is far more to Earth than meets the eye. Yes, Earth represents hearth and home, but that doesn't have to mean that I spend my life there. I'm not chained to my spinning wheel. So instead of focussing on ways to keep me at home, I've focussed instead on ways of making myself a home to spend time in. I've started nesting. My presents from my family were all earthy, hearth presents. A salt pig for the kitchen, an olive wood pestle and mortar. I've wanted these things for a very long time, and yet something always held me back from having them.
So what has changed? I think/feel/sense that gradually I am becoming more "in the moment". I'm making a conscious effort to ask for what I want (in every sense) and not to delay having for some far off time when everything is going to be perfect and I will "deserve" what I receive. I think I am starting to learn to listen to my true will. And to question it. Everywhere I look the message is that I am supposed to experience joy in this lifetime, so that is what I will strive to do.
