Welcome to 2009, come in and sit down. The briars have grown up and the path is weedy, but there is still a seat for you by the hearth. You don't mind if I spin while we talk, do you?
It has been almost half a year since my last meaningful post here. I think I had forgotten that I had this space. Oh not the actual space, since I've tweaked and twiddled here and there, but the intellectual space. I'll probably be criticised for using the term "intellectual" - far too cerebral, far too "right-brain" - but I defend it. It is who I am, and if I can't be who I am then I am nothing.
I see the world as a child sees it, and like a child I categorise every new thing I come across. I see things with the same awe and wonder as a child sees them, and I struggle to maintain that childlike quality in my daily life. Without childish wonder there can be no liminality, no enchantment in the world.
I think the malaise that has crept in over the last six months hasn't been due to any particular change in my overall outlook; more in my interaction with the day to day. Life had become arid and dry. My creative juices had dried up. I was suffocating.
I never did come to terms with being in Air - those lofty heights never appealed. Like a fish out of water I gasped and flopped about and became dizzy with the lack of oxygen to the brain. The lack of oxygen to feed the fires that burn deep within me. They almost went out.
Almost.
To say that I have felt the shift into Fire as palpable is to understate it. I have felt consumed by it. Burned up in it and set aflame! I have passion and vigour - I want to go out and see the world and be part of it. I have a spiritual life again! I have always considered myself to be a fiery person - Saggitarius rising, Fire Snake, wearer of my "Trademark" red. Full of piss and vinegar and too opinionated to make an easy wife. But where did that spark go?
A telemarketer in India suggested I take ginger. I'm taking ginger, lemon, basil, I've washed every red item of clothing I possess and I've lit a dozen candles round my bed. I'm feverish, choleric, hot blooded.
I am Fire.
