I've been holding off writing this post. I wanted to avoid sliding into my navel, and the urge to type now is just too great. I have 4 1/2 hours of tense waiting time to fill and no energy for work, nor inclination to go outside in the rain to walk off my nervous energy.
Lovely Venus goes direct today, in the sign of her exaltation. This by all rights should be a day of celebration. Fading fast are the last 6 weeks of love strife. My emotional garden as well as my actual garden should be blooming, and yet there are storm clouds gathering on both horizons.
I am April showers. My mood swings from upbeat and optimistic one minute, to gloomy and overcast the next. I know the best way to nurture the seedlings trying to push their way up out of the soil in my soul is to tenderly shine down on them, to sprinkle them with soft water. And my hands are all thumbs.
I have read all the books, done all the inner work. My heart is as light as a feather. Now I look on with concern as my hours and days of hard work could all be ruined in a moment. I'm scouring the skies for an omen. I dare to hope.
